The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

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Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.

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225: Cucooking and Organisming

September 30, 2018 at 11:00PM • 1 hour 4 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about tourette syndrome, neighbor affairs, Russian satanism, and being less overwhelming with special guest Darren Herczeg!

Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

This awkward week we're talking about tourette syndrome feedback, neighbors, affairs, and and aliens, russian satanism, being less overwhelming with special guest Darren Herczeg!

Awkward Story Time: Erica dials a phone number for a needy woman on an airplane.

Special guests: Darren Herczeg 


Anonymous: "Just listened to your August 28th episode. You mention tourettes in it so I thought I'd message you guys and tell you about my syndrome :) I twitch my eyes and alot of my body it feels like a sneeze or maybe like when your legs twitch when you're high (this doesnt happen to me when high tho). I also have the coperlalia (swearing) my word is "fuck" but I can get around it by saying "fuh" sometimes lol. With tourettes add, ADHD, autism, OCD, and depression are usually there as well so I wont have children because of the risk of giving them autism. I dont twitch or swear during sex or masterbation i also dont twitch when I'm completely asleep. Driving a car is easy but i do still twitch while i drive i just hold them in or pull over if i have a really bad day :). I'd say it could be a sexy disorder considering we look like tragic disasters sometimes when we freeze up in some sort of twitch. I've actually passed out before from having to hold my breath and try to blink my left eye just right Haha. Well that's all I have to say :)"

Our favorite fan: "Hi awkward humans! Love you all. Thank you for all the laughs.....Darren, let the haters fuel your rise. Erica, so nice to listen to. Richard, I will always pronounce your name deserve that. Adam, I love how you give logical, sensitive advice to insane situations.

So I recently moved to a new town closer to work, and had my cousin (30yr old female heterosexual or so I thought) come up and help get me settled. I'm a solo dad (meaning no mom around) of a 7yr old and shit gets crazy so I needed the help. So everything went great, then Friday we were having dinner and drinks, when my neighbor came up. I'd already met her husband, and she seemed nice also, so when she asked for a drink we happily made her one. . . Well soon enough my cousin and her went from meditating to my bed wtf. Neighbor is in her late 40s with kids. Now I have to see her and husband every other day and just.... I don't know what. Of course my cuz is long gone and I'm left with the awkward encounters. This is an older city neighborhood with a main house and a smaller ally house. So we're close proximity. Should I just forget it all..? I don't have any idea what their marriage situation is. I don't have time for this bs. Also she recently asked ME out for drinks... I cant do this.. I just want to work and watch scifi with my kiddo.

Also I think i met an alien, but i wont bogg the show down with that. Just ask if you want more info. Ciao' biches yaz"

Sydney: "The gym I go to is really friendly and everyone kind of knows eachother. My sister met a man a few months ago, and they have just been friends who talk everytime they see eachother while working out. She recently introduced me to him and now, he will not leave me alone. He asked to take me to dinner after my workout and I agreed thinking he was just being friendly, and I came to find out he is 27. I’m 18. He has an extremely thick accent as he moved here from Russia 3 years ago. Everything was going fine until he casually started speaking about his “assignments”. His “contract with the devil was murder- but he couldn’t do it. Something kept pulling him from it.” He then brought up the cult and how he knows witches at our gym. I told him that I knew nothing about cults and his response was to send me videos about ex-satanists and saved Devil worshippers. He now sends me texts all the time asking to take me out- I dont know what to tell him or what to say. I’m not interested in any way. I can’t even go to the gym at my normal hours because I feel too awkward seeing him. Advice? "

Talia: "Hi, I've listened to your show for a while and it's 10/10 would recommend. So I just started dating (literally yesterday) a guy who I have been best friends with for about 2 years, after he told me he had feelings and they were mutual. I have a tendency to expect too much from boyfriends by comparing my relationship to everyone else, and I know it's a bad thing to do. My last boyfriend was a cold asshole, he wouldn't even really talk to me unless we were alone at one of our houses. I always felt unwanted and constantly tried to get his attention, but of course that just pushed him away more. Now I'm hyper aware of doing my best to keep my distance and not piss people off by smothering them, and I guess this isn't totally healthy either. So my question is how do I give a relationship space and not expect a perfect boyfriend, but also not be distant? I just want to find that balance, and I really want this to work out, he's a great dude and one of my best friends."