The Awkward Human Survival Guide Retired

The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

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Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.

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Three Awkward Years: Part I

156: Three Awkward Years: Part I

March 14, 2017 at 12:00PM • 1 hour 15 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about bisexual bridesmaids, birthday placentas, and gay matchmaking! Also, it's our third year anniversary and it's going to take two episodes! This is part one, and Darren joins us for both. As always, visit if you have questions!

Visit the new Awkward Human Shop to buy a non-date with Erica or a fancy new shirt!

Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Darren's live-in chef/boyfriend pukes in a Lyft ride, and elsewhere.

This Week's Questions:

  • Smoggies asks, "Hi! Just heard the pod today! I'm going to be on vacation in Mexico for 2 weeks, I'll get some for her till then if she can wait ;). PS. I'm female, live in bc and i used to go by the name of Jub Jub. hehehehehehehehehehehehe"
  • James asks, "Voicemail (comment)."
  • Mattheyous asks, "Voicemail about placentas and Latin definitions."
  • Bisexual Bridesmaid Blues asks, "Hello Awkward humans! I'm a bi woman in the UK. Sorry in advance for the length of this... First off, just wanted to say I love the show. I'm a delivery driver and I listen to it at work, so your advice keeps me company and helps me pass the time while I'm driving around. So, here's my problem. My brother is getting married in a few weeks, I'm a bridesmaid, and I think the wedding is going to be a trainwreck.... Both my brother and his fiance are terrible with money and organisation, but when myself or other family members have tried to help or give advice they've completely ignored us. This has led to some (In my opinion) kind of terrible decision-making on their part. For instance: They've booked, paid for and then cancelled at multiple venues already, wasting a bunch of money. After choosing red & black as a colour scheme and buying all the suits, bridesmaids outfits etc. the bride has decided to dye her hair bright purple for the ceremony (Although I am all for folk choosing the hair-colour they want, and I've certainly dyed my hair bright colours in the past, I just feel like it's going to look terrible in the context of everything else). Despite me going round a bunch of caterers getting quotes for them (which they asked me to do), they are insisting on wanting cold sandwiches delivered to their house and then having "someone" (Ie, me or another family member) go back and forth carrying platters for 100+ folk to the church later on in the day. I know weddings and family stuff is always going to be stressful, but it's not just me feeling this way. They have alienated a bunch of the rest of my family with how they've been acting. Also, as a past example of their lack of organisation/responsibility, I once drove up to help them move house the day before their lease expired, to discover they still had most of their possessions to pack up. Guess who had to then try and help them pack all their possessions and fit them into two medium sized cars? That was the single most stressful 24 hours of my life and I feel like it's happening all over again with this wedding... They get very defensive and upset when criticized as well, so I can't have a frank conversation with them about all this. (The last time I tried to talk out a difficult conversation my brother about how he had hurt my feelings, he shouted at me so much that it fucked me up emotionally for a long time) So, for my own sanity and well-being I have stepped back from even trying to help with anything, and I am just counting the days till it's over. My question is, how do I get through the (multiple) bridal parties that have been organised, and the day itself? Any advice for stress-relief, or strategies for staying calm when they're doing something infuriating? How do I stand my ground if I'm suddenly called on to run around and fix a fuck-up on the day? Unfortunately calling in sick on the day probably isn't an option (Though I have considered it...)... help!"

Special Segment: Gay Matchmaking Club!

Final Thoughts: Are you bloated or were you just happy to see that pizza?

Related Links:

  • Mason Glenn's Site: Gay Matchmaking Club's lead matchmaker. Check him out and his book at his site!
  • Gay Matchmaking Club: Gay Matchmaking Club was founded to fulfill a tremendous need for an effective, dignified, and professional way for quality gay singles to meet and date in Los Angeles. Not only do our matchmakers have nearly two decades of experience in bringing people together, but also they hold degrees in Communication, Sociology, Psychology, and related fields. Gay Matchmaking Club offers world class, personalized services when it comes to dating and finding love. The choice to become a client or apply as a Catch to meet a Client is yours and can vary based on where you are as a gay man on the life spectrum.