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The Awkward Human Survival Guide

The Awkward Human Survival Guide answers the uncomfortable questions everyone encounters on an unfortunately regular basis and talks to people around the world who embrace the stranger side of life.

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Hosted by Adam Dachis, Darren Herczeg, Erica Elson, and Richard Cardenas.

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149: #NotMyQuestion

January 24, 2017 at 5:30PM • 1 hour 16 minutes • Wiki Entry

This awkward week we're talking about threesome complications, toothpaste attraction, and empathic cum eating. Special guest: Abel Horwitz, host and creator of Serial Killer Speed Dating. Questions/comments/stories/whatevers? Call/text 509-AWKWARD or visit

Have a loving and sexually fulfilling Valentine's Day with a special romance kit from Adam & Eve!

Show Notes & Links Presented by CacheFly

Awkward Situation of the Week: Abel shares his first polyamorous experience.

This Week's Questions:

  • Julia (First Klegman Pioneer of 2016) asks, "Hey Adam and other awkward humans! Hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season and end of 2016. I have another update for you guys! My boyfriend and I decided that we were open to us hooking up with people solo sometimes. So, I ended up spending a night with the guy in the couple that we played with. Now, the guy and I have been talking a bunch and are really good friends, but somehow it feels really wrong. I know that my boyfriend is okay with me being friends with him, but it still feels wrong somehow. I don't have any romantic feelings for him, but he is definitely one of those people that I have connected with as friends super quickly. We don't say anything out of line or anything, but I can't help but feel guilty. Am I just overthinking this? Thanks for the advice!"
  • Anonymous (31/SM) asks, "I write to you with a common problem: my wife will perform oral on me, but she will not swallow my cum. I have asked time and again but it disgusts her and she won't do it. On a recent evening we argued over this once again and she said she would eat my cum if I ate my cum first. Is this fair? I go back and forth on it so I would ask you to decide for me."
  • Kelly asks, "Hi Erica, Adam, Richard Carrrrrdennnnnas, and guest(s)! Long time listener first time problem-haver—so excited!! Please call me Kelly when you answer my question. I don't care about anonymity and stuff but I always wanted to be Kelly like on Saved by the Bell so make my dream come true please and thank you!! This question is mostly for Adam because it is about lifehacks. My friend who you can call Lisa uses toothpaste on her zits to dry them out which seems to kinda work for her except she doesn't get it off her face a lot and I think part of her skin is turning like a sea foam green. She doesn't seem to care a whole lot about that so whatever that's not my question. #NotMyQuestion The thing is that she smells like toothpaste and she can't get a boyfriend. Do you think that's why? Smells matter right? #SmellsMatter Is mint a turn-off for boys or something or does she just really have a bad personality and I don't see it? She likes Maroon 5 and fried okra."
  • Victor (SM) asks, "Hey there co-workers. I gots a weird question for yous all. Is it going to be a problem if I date a girl with a different smartphone than me? I mean like she's got an iPhone and I've got an Android phone. Does shit like that matter at all? I'm not gonna decide if I date her cuz of her phone but I was just wondering about it. Does it means anything or is it like circumstantial and whatnot?"

Special Segment: We're very happy to announce our first sponsor, Adam & Eve!

Final Thoughts: Don't be an asshole. If you're thinking about it, and you're like, hmm, maybe I should be an asshole just this once or in this specific situation—stop! Don't do it! Resist the urge!

Related Links:

  • Serial Killer Speed Dating: Serial Killer Speed Dating is speed dating meets murder mystery theater. Real dating, yes, but also acting and theatrics in a lively setting.
  • The Bunker Experience: The Bunker Experience is a real live escape game with a maze, set in a post-apocalyptic sci-fi world. Timing and teamwork is everything - it is essential to complete the thrills and suspense filled mission in order to Survive The Bunker.
  • Zombie Joe's Underground: A theater that specializes in horror and macabre entertainment.